This story will make sense later...

One of the most miserable experiences of my life. Some years ago (so many that I'm not sure exactly when it was) I went to Montreal to visit Jon, with friends Liz and Jen. We were walking around downtown, it was hot, it was summer, when Jon suggested we stroll up to the Mount Royal park. Everyone seemed excited to go, so I agreed; even though I probably would have preferred to find a nice air-conditioned coffee shop to sit in somewhere.

I should have know this wasnt going to be fun, and I probably should have turned back, when before we even hit the mountain, when there were still houses and shops around us, the ground started to incline and I started to whine. I slowed down considerably, while my "friends" (I use quotation marks because at the time I was sure I'd never speak to any of them again) hopped and skipped and pranced up the hill. I was the fat kid in the Goonies pleading, "wait up guuuys!"

I'm not going to describe how Jon got me to the foot of the mountain because it was too humiliating. I also won't describe how much pleasure some of the company seemed to be taking watching me struggle and motivating me to keep going. Of course, that's just from my side of things. Maybe my dear friends aren't sadistic assholes.

Anyhoo, a few hours later, after me pleading for breaks and receiving few, we made it up the mountain. Hooray. I rested a few minutes, looked over the edge, and then they were at it again. They wanted to find the big illuminated cross. I wanted to kill them all. I wanted to take a nap. I wanted to find a taxi.

So, with my calves on fire we continued roaming around the mountain, getting lost, finding our way, finding the park, becoming bored of the park, getting hungry, descending the mountain. I don't remember much else.

Unrelatedly, on that same trip we all planned to go canoeing. We spent 3 hours driving to a park and spent our last few dollars renting canoes. As soon as Liz and I settled into our tiny boat, in about two feet of water, I started to have a panic attack and had to be brought back to shore. Apparently, I am deathy afraid of water.

Everyone but me squeezed into the other canoe, and went out for a few hours while I sat on the beach with a pack of cigarettes. And no lighter. Because it was Jon's and he thought he may want to smoke on the boat. Son of a bitch.

Note: Jon, Liz, and Jen, if you've read this far, you know I love you guys now, but this is a story about a couple of hours when I really, really didn't. Please feel free to add your version in the comments, but try not to give away why I'm writing this.

Jon-a-ton

Jon left this morning for Vietnam. You can read about some of our adventures on his blog.

So, I guess it's really cheap to hire a maid in Vietnam, and all foreigners are expected to do it. That alone is making me consider a transfer to the communist poverty stricken country. I mean, could you imagine no longer having to do dishes? Maybe she'd even clean out Raspberry-chan's litter box for a shiny American nickel. That'd be sweet. Vietnam rocks.

While Jon was here my diet drastically changed. I went from canned tomato and noodles everyday to real meals. We made kung pao tofu and veggies, hot and sour soup, real tomato sauce, roasted vegetables, and Motto even stepped it up a notch, making us all homemade tempura and oishi soba! It was quite a week.

Raspberry-chan really misses him.

Did I mention...?

So my B.F.F.L. Jon is giving it all up and moving to Vietnam next month. Apparently, I made the orient cool again. He's volunteering to help save the planet, or at least give us a few more seconds of clean air before it all goes to shit. You can read a much better explanation of why he's going and what he's doing here, on his blog. Before he goes he's coming to Japan for a few days, which is like sticking your toe in the pool to check the temperature before you jump in.

Jon is the biggest eco-freak I've ever met, since high school, before "green" was printed on t-shirts, he was packing me waste free lunches and sighing at me when I didn't recycle properly. And recycling is just the tip of the iceberg for Jon. Like any modern eco-freakian (just coined that, it will catch on soon), he doesn't smell like patchouli or smoke pot (usually), he doesnt own Birkenstocks or have a beard. You could like this guy.

So, go read about Jon's interesting fund raising techniques (waffles and haircuts) and leave a supportive comment (or even more supportive donation) at Chronicles of the Next Floor.

Facts of Life

Ok, I guess it's getting confusing to some readers (more like lurkers, stalkers and family members). Or maybe it's your first time here (you probably Googled Gaijin Showers and found my blog by mistake). Anyway, here's what's going on with me and the fiasco-that-is-Japan, presently:


I am sitting at a table I stole from my last apartment, writing this offline while waiting for the unsecured wireless internet signal to bless me with it's presence once more tonight. I cant stop thinking about the fact I only have 272 MB of free disc space left on my hard-drive. A balloon in the right hand corner keeps reminding me. This just leads to thoughts about buying an external hard-drive, which leads to thoughts about just buying a new laptop, which leads to thoughts about paying for internet service so I dont have to hold my laptop up with one hand at a 30 degree angle while facing northeast to get a connection. But then I remember my credit card bill. And how I havent worked in three months.

I came here in September, wide-eyed and ready to love Japan and all it's backwards kookiness. Some things helped me steer off that path; in mid-October company I worked for collapsed and filed for bankruptcy. Also, the food sucks.


It was all fun and games for a while (in between panic attacks and chocolate binges) and being unemployed and not paid for a month's work was OK because there was a big group of us going through it... having tea parties, OC marathons, and countless nomihodi. Of course, one-by-one parents stopped sending money and people started going home. Being the newest of the bunch I was determined to stick it out and have my year in Japan. I would not going back home to retail.

I went job hunting. My internet service at home was cut off, due to not paying the bill. So whenever I had ¥472 to burn I'd bike twenty minutes to the nearest internet cafe and send off my resume and headshot. The job market was flooded with thousands of gaijin newly looking for work. But by early November I'd received a few offers. One of them was at a school in Korea. I didnt want to uproot myself again so I chose an English school in Tokuyama. It's right next door to Kudamatsu and where I spent most of my time anyway.

There was one problem though, the position didnt begin until January 22. I had a brilliant plan of working at a Korean winter camp for the two months in between, but even after a phone interview I was unable to work it out.

So, to make a long story longer, I spent a few months squatting in my apartment (no one paid the rent, no one made me leave). The days went by slowly. I spent them reading books, taking baths, cooking, meeting people, drinking and trying to get private English lessons. Poverty and stress took the fun out of unemployment, but there were some adventures.


Jon came in early December and saved me from total despair (temporarily), he left for Australia, came back, and we met up in Tokyo. After a week I went back to Kudamatsu, packed up my stuff and moved into my new apartment in Tokuyama. I have two weeks before my new job begins. I have two months before I receive my first full paycheck. And I never got the money owed to me from the first school I worked for.


Right now I'm stuck in Japan, financially. I refuse to leave before paying off the debt accumulated by coming here.

I live in Japan out of spite.


(Christmas party photo)

Progress

Thanks so much for the books everyone!

I've started to learn some Japanese and read a bit of kanji. I'm no where near the 2,000 characters the Japanese government deems 'essential' but I have figured out I live in Yamaguchi, or 山口. 山 [yama] means 'mountain' and and '口' [guchi] can mean mouth or opening. I think it is pronounced kuchi when you're talking about a mouth.

So, Im like practically fluent, right?

Ive been doing that to keep busy. And picking up a few English lessons. Jon came to Kudamatsu Friday, so Ive been bringing him around, showing him the sights... the rice fields, internet cafe, The Mall. We went to Miyajima yesterday and had fun going in the mountains looking at deer and looking for monkeys. I even saw a raccoon-dog! Which is a recent life-long dream of mine.

Tuesday night Im having a nabe party at my house, with Jon and some of the Japanesies (nickname for the gaggle of Japanese women we hang out with). Tonight we're headed to the Indian restaurant and Antonio's yatai.

Ok, my time is up!

I'm Hungry

I need ideas for food. Im sick of eating rice and pasta and pizza everday.

The restrictions are:
+Must be vegetarian
+I have no oven, blender, food processor, microwave
+I do have a toaster oven and stove
+Has to use simple ingredients that I have a chance of recognizing without having to read a package
+Inexpensive

Ready...Go!

"Konnichiwa, Bitches"

Jon has bought his ticket to visit me in December! I am super excited!

So I bought some instant drip coffee stuff, so I kind of have coffee now. The soy milk I bought tasted horrible. Maybe it wasnt soy milk.

I went to an electronics store last night and the laptops were all super cheap. I guess it would be cool to have a machine with kanji capabilities? After work settles down, and I know my branch isnt closing, I may try to buy a new computer (I feel bad stealing my roommate's all the time). I would need help figuring out all the specs though. I have time.

We're going to try to get an internet phone, so we can call the US & Canada wicked cheap. That would be rad. Seriously, Ive been doing way too much typing, and I havent even begun to describe what it is like here.

Last night the Aussie-across-the-hall-neighbor, Roomie, the English girl (I need to make better nicknames) and I went and played pool (I sucked) at the only place to do anything in Kudamatsu. Saturday night and it was hopping (not). There were a few Japanese people there playing, with really stern dedication, we were all loud, laughing, having some fun. Then we went to the video store and rented Dodgeball, which (for obvious reasons) I had never seen.

I want to post a video tour of the apartment later today. Stay tuned!